Tuesday, 19 October 2010

Day 55 Some you win, and some you win ;)

Mood today: ambivalent.

I've been invited to an old school reunion in December. And I'm feeling excited and full of trepidation in equal measure. These are women, girls when I knew them who shared my life for nearly 7 years, and are to a large extent responsible for many of my behaviours today. Some good, some bad. I always thought of my boarding school days as hell on earth, but since thinking about it and looking at it from another angle, there were some, many great things about being with those girls. :) So despite my trepiditious inclinations, I'm going. And only something unexpected and unplanned for will stop me. I want to make peace with my past and I'm being given a wonderful opportunity to see these women who have, in many memories of mine been demonized, as just ordinary fallible human beings. People change after all. :) I truly think going to this reunion is going to be a win:win for me.

Food stats today: hmmm. Chocolate and marshmallows and cheese and salty ryvita spread with marmite...gosh. Still - way better than eating pork pies, Indian veggie samosas and onion bhajees, whole tubes of Pringles, packets of Chocolate Crimbles, Marmite Twiglets, Honey Roast Cashews...urgh. I swear I have not eaten those things in ages! Think I'll save sampling those for around Christmas instead of everyday ;)

Ahem. Food stats for today are SW Green Day Syns 88 calories 2902. In addition to my snacks of cheese, ryvita with marmite, chocolate & marshmallows, I have had a good lunch - pork loin chop with cabbage, mash, peas & gravy and a decent dinner - hommos wrap with  julienned carrot & peppers, salsa and chopped lettuce, and a Medjool date for fruit. I've drunk water - a couple of glasses, roobios tea and rosehip tea. Maybe I'm developing a herbal tea habit for the winter? Not having milk in drinks will save a few calories.

It is good for me to write down the things I eat and account for my syns and calories. because by doing so I am getting to that place where I am aware of my food, and aware of my choices, instead of being blind and stuffing my face without accounting that fact to myself. If anyone is reading this blog, and thinking gosh that's a BIG number, well, this is MY journey to health, not anyone else's. Perhaps one day I will be the one posting 1500 cal and 0 Syn totals and exercise of an hour swimming or an hour in the gym or a long walk every day. But for now, damn, I'm doing so well for this fat girl. :)

Power back to me!

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