Thursday, 16 December 2010

Day 115 Cooking...

Small successes all add up to creating a sense of well-being and empowerment. I think that is what I am really looking for. Not just having a body that works well, and that allows me to do all sorts of stuff, but also having the mindset that enables me to think of, and go out and do it!

Cooking is one place I find this. I remember at 19, trying to cook as I imagined how a dish ought to be made, and failing dismally. Ohh the sulks and disgruntlement, and anger I felt. I now realise it was because I had not lived up to my own expectations of a 'perfect' dinner. I was not living in the moment either. Hello, little 18 year old me, from this perspective I'm living now, it is okay to not be perfect, to not succeed at everything, so long as I keep on trying. That's the thing you didn't think about, that living life is one huge experiment. An experiment in living, and practice truly does make everything improve.

The point of this ramble is that I tried two experimental dishes last night. They both look good. The oven kindly behaved itself, thank you, universe! I'd never done those particular recipes before. But what I realised as I was making them was, I had a wealth of experience of making different recipes which informed how I went about making these. Collected wisdom. And because I had noticed certain things before, when something didn't look quite right, or smell or taste quite what I expected, I made adjustments. And that is the thing. To constantly keep making adjustments to this recipe for living life, and to enjoy the process. And I did enjoy making my two desserts yesterday. The planning. The shopping (I went to 2 different places to get stuff!). The assembly.

Now I'm going to be transporting my creations to a hopefully appreciative audience. If there are leftovers, I'll pop by to see my brother and inflict some lemon cake on him!

Today's photo is supposed to be of me at the last party I went to. Unfortunately, I have no photos of that. It was a lovely tea party, during the summer in a friend's garden, that backs onto some woods. And afterwards we went for a little walk, to visit an allotment or rather most everyone else went for a walk and I drove to the destination because at that point I still couldn't walk anywhere far, or fast. Today though I think I could. :) And maybe I will, next time I go to G's house. Here's me last summer.


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