Friday, 10 December 2010

Day 108 A temporary setback

I did really well until this evening, when I opened my mail and found a letter sent by one of the women from my old school. She was telling us why she couldn't come to our reunion, and detailed the wonderful life she had, and I got upset by that. At first I tried to deal with my feelings - inadequacy, regret, sadness that my life wasn't as perfect as hers, then later found myself in the kitchen scoffing sardines on toast, followed by crackers & cheese, chocolate digestives and an evening with a very sore stomach laid out on the sofa.

How to deal with this? I have to face that my life is all because of my choices. As hers is hers because of her choices. And also, she is NOT better than me, only different. And her life is no reason for me to derail my life by intemperate eating! Also - I have come to the conclusion my stomach finds it difficult to deal with such foods now. Or perhaps I am wheat sensitive, or fats sensitive. It has been hours and I still feel yukky.

I'm going to have to do some remembering, and practice some EFT on this. I refuse to have negative thoughts of this woman influencing my behaviour. I wish her well in her life, and am looking forward to seeing the other women who are coming to this reunion and hearing their stories.

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