Monday, 1 December 2014


I'm enjoying myself at the moment, chatting to various men on a dating website. Something I haven't done in a long long time.

Currently I'm intrigued by one, being semi-pursued by another, and have the tender sensibilities of another to assuage. To none of these men have I promised anything apart from a chance to meet me. Yet for the first I am really hopeful. Because he is funny and cute. And I'm very much attracted to his picture. And his lovely voice. Yes, I know men post the best photo they have, and yes, they sometimes lie. I like him, his personality very much. The second man is also lovely, he is a teaser, I would like to meet him. But I don't have the same fizzing excitement as I do with the first. The third, well, I think he needs a friend. I could be surprised and find he astounds me. I won't know that till I meet him in person.

It is nice all this. After so many years of feeling miserable, this optimism and acceptance of whatever might or might not transpire is heady. And what I find the most amusing is that I have only lost 6% of my bodyweight. And have lost a front tooth. I have a long way to go yet, and I may never go out with any of these guys. But for now the anticipation of meeting is sweet and I am enjoying myself.

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